Hello, my blood Sista in Christ through the risen savior.
I know this weekly report is a day early, but this word is like fire shut up in my bones and I can’t contain it until tomorrow.
I send up prayers of thanksgiving for your faithfulness to lovingly share this part of my journey. It means so much to me and I am continuously cheered for the journey. You remain in my heart and in my prayers. This is a longer missive, but they seem to be growing every week. I am grateful and hope you patiently endure. I also pray you receive something from what the Lord is giving me. There is something building, and I am not sure exactly what it is. As you will see below, my struggle is real.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 – There is an appointed time for everything. And there us a time for every event under heaven.
All my life I have questioned my purpose for being here and God’s timing in my life. I have felt forever and a day that I was either a day late and a dollar short or too early at the train station and impatiently awaiting something that seemed like it would never come. This week has been one of a particularly challenging nature as the need to know I have been used by God and am the right track has superseded my faith and trust that God has me and all is well. I have struggled to abound and abase and be content in whatever situation I find myself because I know I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
As most of you know, I often use the analogy of myself as a marlin in the Gulf of Mexico who is on the hook of the fisherman. I don’t want to be caught and I don’t want to be pulled into the boat. I want my will and my way. I often see me jumping high in the air on the line and it is taking six people to hold the pole and anchor the fisherman down to keep him from being pulled into the water with me.
I am moving and living and being in Christ Jesus but if the truth be told, I don’t feel it. What has feelings God to do with living in and living with Christ. Only the devil knows. Faith and hope in Christ are not a feeling, it is a knowing that He is always with me and will never leave of forsake me. Oooops, I didn’t feel that way this week. I wanted to take over the wheel and handle things myself. I wanted to see further than the step I am standing on and wanted halogen lighting to see further into the future than Holy Spirit led living requires. I am caught up in my feelings and therefore I am frustrated and confused.
As I study “Discerning the Voice of God. How to Recognize When God is Speaking” by Priscilla Shirer the following passages were sent my way:
Jesus expressed this idea to His disciples when He said, “I have many things to say to you, but you cannot bear them now” (John 16:12). In other words, there’s a time for everything in your life. God alone knows what that is. And because His Spirit dwells within you, and because He is deeply interested in helping you experience the fullness of His plans for your life, you can just stay tuned and know that He’ll make it clear to you right in time, even as He keeps you loved and encourages by His presence along the way…the timing of His message will be as important as the message itself. Have confidence in this: if you don’t know yet, you don’t need to move forward yet.
“This means that the purposes of God not only involve specific plans; they also involve specific timing. He has not only orchestrated the events in your life, but also the chronological framework in which they will occur when he speaks and allows you to catch sight of His movements, it will be in concert with His perfect timing.”
The Rhema word I received this week in the answer to what is my purpose for living and do I have a purpose came back thusly:
“…God who has saved me and called me to a holy life – not because of anything I have done but because of His own purpose and grace. This grace was given me in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time,” II Timothy 1:9.
Therefore, before I was born God created a plan and purpose for me to grow and to transform me to be more like Him. I was born into His purpose and He will complete the work he has begin in me, guaranteed. Once again I am to allow myself to be caught up in His Spirit and be landed in the boat of his purpose and allow Him to lead I guide me to His perfect end of my life…living in heavenly places and knowing Him in real ways because of our intimate loving relationship covered in grace and mercy…peace, provision and protection. I am to let the love light of Jesus Christ shine through me knowing all is well always. It’s not a feeling, it is a guarantee that I can trust no matter what.
I am receiving the unction to move out in the planning of a “Gathering of the Elders” recognition day for the 4 remaining siblings of my grandmother and grandfather. Robert and Sadie Slaughter. Sr. It’s time to give thanks and give back to those who have given so much to us. The second thing is to start to build the blog, “Meetings in the Board Room with the CEO”. I feel as if I am feeling in the dark and I guess I want the road map before I start out. That is what GPS living does to us. We get to plan the trip and see the way before we ever step foot into the car. Those who know me, please don’t laugh to hard. You know I am the one who sets the GPS and ignores it all along the way. OOOPS! There goes that marlin mentality. I ask prayers and any words or suggestions that may come your way. I love hearing from you and am accepting of your loving attention when I don’t. I would that this loving missive between us would never become cumbersome or bothersome but always a point of hope and liberation.
As always, I remain in your service and available to be of assistance through the anointing of the Holy Spirit. I appreciate when you share your concerns and ask me to join you in pray for the things that concern you. Where two or three are gathered in His name, He is present. Unity brings deliverance and miracles become a regular occurrence.